Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
