Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
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