Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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