Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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