If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
