cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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