I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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