And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
