Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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