Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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