I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
