he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
