I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
