Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
