she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
