There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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