drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
