i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
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