Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
