She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
i think my cat just said my name.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
