we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
someone owes me an orgasm
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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