so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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