Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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