Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
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