took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
