Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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