their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
