I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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