Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
