that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
