I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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