Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
