im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
