Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize
