margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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