I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
the gays at disneyland are vicious
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
