He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
