garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
