so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
