It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
