Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
