Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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