honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
