Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Randomize
