HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
