You work out of a Hotel?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
