Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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