Barsexuality is the new black.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize