so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize