i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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